stupid pet peeves

I'm supremely relaxed by nature. A true easy-goer. Which is why I'm always surprised when I discover a pet peeve. My current angry obsession is so stupid, I'm almost embarrassed to report it.

I think it may be therapeutic, though. And maybe a couple of you will agree with me.

Don't get me wrong, it's not like I go postal about this stuff. I just notice with prejudice.

So here's the juice:

I play a fair share of online poker. Maybe an hour a day. Never for real money, usually in a tournament of some kind.

Being that it's "online," online poker has its fair share of "shortcut" acronyms. Little phrases like "nh" (nice hand), "vnh" (very nice hand), and so on. Those of you who chat at all probably know the other standards, "lol" (lots of laughs), "rotf" (rolling on the floor). And of course "ty" and "yw." Thank you and you're welcome.

Here's what (completely unnecessarily) gets my goat. When someone draws a great hand, like four of a kind. Or a full house. And someone else says "vnh."

So far so good. It was a very nice hand. Saying so isn't strange. Though I'd prefer something a little more poetic, it still does what it's supposed to do.

And then the person who drew the great hand says "ty."

Thank you?

Let's analyze the possible reasons you'd say "thank you" after someone notices that you drew a great hand in poker.

1. You mean to say, "thank you for noticing."
If this is the case, my response is, "duh." Who wouldn't notice a straight flush? No need to thank me for doing what every other (good) player at the table is doing: watching the cards. I doubt this is the correct evaluation of the TYR (thank you response), though.

2. You mean to say, "thank you for the compliment."
This is the more likely true meaning of the TYR, isn't it? And it's the courteous thing to do, right? Someone compliments you, you say thanks. Everyone should be so well-adjusted. Except that you didn't get the compliment. Your cards did. And you didn't have anything to do with drawing them.

Yeah, I know. It's a stupid pet peeve. I can't help it.

Just so you all don't think I'm a hopeless social assassin, here's my solution to the problem:

Let's introduce a new character pair into the mix: wp.

Well Played.

As in, "I've been watching, and even though you drew the flush on the flop, you were patient as hell and because you slow played so brilliantly, you were able to take both my money and my pride in one fell swoop."

Well Played, you dirty rotten no-respect son of a monkey's uncle.

And then and only then, I'll be happy to see someone say ty.

Doesn't that make so much more sense? Compliment me on the stuff I can control, not on the stuff I can't.

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This page contains a single entry by Jeremy published on June 21, 2004 12:16 PM.

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